This past Monday, I started back to school and yesterday I went back to work after two months. I’ve seen a few of my friends this week, I’ve been back in the driver seat and back on the road to the usual places… quite frankly, it is all depressing me.
Anything that reminds me of England or an inside joke from the trip or if I see things laying around my room from the trip, I just sigh and then rewind the wonderful times in my head over and over again. For a while I had been asking myself, “why was I born in Raleigh?”. then I realized, it’s so that I can see all these wonderful places in the world and when it’s time to just take it easy for a bit, then come home and do the ‘norm’ of this thing called, Life.
One can’t necessarily be on a vacation forever…I have to constantly remind myself this and it’s true. We need to make the daily dose of money, get our hour of education in hand and simply enjoy the way things go. I am happy that I had a good time in England but I am also happy to be in my own bed and sleep on my own pillow. I am happy to sit in the driver seat and take myself places I need to go (except when the needle hits E). I am happy to have sweet tea, fried chicken and still be able to have hot tea with biscuits every now and then. I am happy to listen to Hindi songs on repeat, out loud and happy that today, I will get to see a new Hindi film!
These things are part of the ‘norm’ in my life of course and we can’t do some of these things when you travel around the world. We can’t call up friends and say, “hey, Coldstone in 20 minutes!” or “let’s go get Chipotle!” or say, “sorry, I don’t care that you’re sick, I’m already outside your room”! It is impossible to do these things while being abroad.
Of course the life-style abroad was rather much more adventurous, spontaneous and brought something new to my eyes each day. I’d like to live that life for a longer period of time in my future, but it is good to simply be home and enjoy the little things which I have missed.
In my entire life though, this has to be the one of two best summers I’ve had in my life. The second one being when I went to New York City last summer. But neither of these trips are in any order; I am still debating in my head constantly whether I liked New York better or England better. I keep thinking England would be better but then I feel I am betraying my childhood dreams of wanting to always live in New York City. Either way though, I think I’d live in both places for long periods of times in my life.
So what’s the next destination in my life? Travel wise, nothing is planned yet. Otherwise, I am just working closer and closer towards my career path. I am juggling my old schedule and for some reason it is a lot harder for me to get back into it. School has been at the top of my life lately and I think it needs to stay this way for a while… which means films is my second and for my film-fanatics, film reviews and updates will be delayed (apologies before hand). Of course though, once I get in the swing of things then I’ll try to be on-time when positing updates!
Generally though, there is no plan left. I am simply going with the flow… I think I have burnt my brain out from pre-planning and constantly expecting more and more out of myself and others as well. It’s not that I haven’t been reaching goals or completing things on-time; more like just giving myself time to breathe in all this space that we don’t take advantage of.
I remember when I saw the Hollywood film, 500 Days of Summer the comparison scene between expectations & reality really strikes to my mind a lot, and often lately. We’d all love for our expectations to turn out 100% accurate as pictured in our mind, but reality doesn’t treat that too well and almost demolishes it into little pieces. So, better to expect nothing and be happy with the way everything goes…with the flow.
For now, signing out! Look out for the Mardaani film review this weekend.
See You At the Movies!
- A New Girl in a City –