Today I was talking to a friend who recently lost their grandfather. He said to me, “it just doesn’t seem real”. It took me a while to respond to the text message because I began to think of myself and realized how sometimes I wake up in the morning and think is this really my life? Did I really lose my father ten years ago to brain cancer or is this just all a bad dream.
I always hope it is just a bad dream, eventually though, I snap into reality and carry on. How does one simply adapt to a lifestyle without a parent in almost their entire life though? I think from age 8 through 14 or 15 it never really hit me. It actually may have hit me at my 16th birthday celebration. I remember planning my large party and googling the many traditions that occur at a sweet 16 birthday and one of the number one things on the list was the “father daughter dance”. Even if my dad was there to celebrate my 16th birthday, I may have not even put that type of event in my party just because those things are saved for wedding days… even so, whether it was to be my 16th or in the future on my wedding day, I will never get that opportunity. After a while I thought about it and thought how would I dance with my dad, he was 6’1″, but in my mind I’m remembering him when I was a short tiny 6 year old and this tall man who looked like a giant to me.
The lifestyle of no father figure is tough, in Hindi Films, the father is portrayed as “the head of the family”. In American society, the father is portrayed as the Man of the House and in the eyes of a daughter he is just the “best person in this world”. It’s hard and tough, those words are understatements though. The lifestyle is almost indescribable. It almost kills me when I see kids my age or any age trash talk their parents even when they are mad, if you have a mother and father in your life, you should just be grateful enough. Never take advantage of the time you spend with your parents, never push them out of your life as you get older but bring them closer. Let them in on your life. Life is unpredictable, tomorrow you never know what will happen and when. Appreciate what you have and don’t take advantage of what is given to you.